I am an agent, an agent of demise!

Speils to remember by(please forgive the wrong grammars, they're intentional):

"Hello this is callcenter_ idiot(not real name), may I have your first and last full name?!? Please? Please!! Please oh I beg you!! Come on, man!! Tell me the problem later, I still have to check if you're registered here before I can help you further! Please tell me your name first! Okey just give me your first name! Don't panic, I'm here to assists you! Just need your NAME first!!"

"Hello? Hello!!!?!... Yeeepie a dead call!!!"

"Ok hold on, while I transfer you to the correct department. YES!! SAVED BY A WRONG CALL!! "

"Ok thanks for the information, I see you're having problems with the toaster and you called-in because you have nobody to help you with your problem. Is that correct? Ok I'll just have to connect you to the technical department who can assist you with that. We're the sales department!! -- Ha ha let the technical handle that whiner!!"

"I see you're having problems with your toaster? Ok I'll connect you to sales department, we're the technical group! One mement please!! -- Those freaking sales group sold the customer a junk!!"

"I'm sorry the supervisor is not available at the moment. I'm sure you can email your problem if you have further complaints... Oh! I remember, you don't have a PC! Please hold! --- Thank you for waiting, I'll just have to give you an tag number so you can call us back with that reference number! Oh ok, then can I call back in an hour. Please calm down! I understand you're going through right now. yes. yes. ok. ok. ok. yes. yes. ----- Oh that's great you fixed the problem! Ok thank you for calling, have a nice day!"

"You finally fix your issue. Is there anything else I could have help you with? Oh you're husbund been cheating you? Ok, Anything else? Your cat just died? I'm so sorry to hear that! Anything else? Somebody stole your credit card? Ok now let's check your account..."

"I see, I just have an offer you can't refuse! It's our new product, try it, it's for.... hello? hello? I think you didn't heard it's for free."

"Thank you for calling, our lines are available 24/7 everyday, the whole year round, forever and ever! AMEN!"

"I apologize for the inconvinence. Let me assure you that you're in good hands. -----[mute] Oh my god, what will I do!! What will I do!!!!"

"How's the weather there? I see."

"Do you love dogs?"

"I'm a dog lover myself."

"I'm a cat lover myslef."

"When did this problem occured? 10 years ago? ok yes it's still covered by warranty. Yes we still support you. Let me check. ok Let me recommend upgrade for better features?"

"Who the winner in the NFL games this season? NFL? N as in Nancy? Right! Right! Ok. I'm sorry to hear. Maybe next time! --- These chinese-american are not patriotic."

"I'm from India. Yes. Yes. hello? Hello?"

"I'm calling from Canada. Yes. hello?"

"I'm calling from China. Hello?"

"Im calling from Manila. Hello?"

"Have you seen PS3? It's awesome!! Sorry, I apologize ma'am, I forgot you're don't like console!"

"I'm sorry sir if you're in a hurry and have to go in 2 minutes, I'll just have to give you a number to call back. Yes this would only take a moment. Hold on my files are still loading.. searching.. hold on, almost there! ... wait... oh wrong folder! Going back! there we go. click here, click here. type in password... accessing file... opening exel.... searching our number... ... ahh --- It's not here!!! -- wait here it is. it's 1-800 ... uh hello? hello? hello? Still there? Ok still there, here's our number.---- Oh!!! you want to continue our work? The kids are here? Oh your dad picked them up. Ok, No problem. Let me access the documents i've closed a while ago and reopen the case..."

"Yes sir, I couldn't agree more! That is a great choice,sir! Buy it! Buy it! I really don't recommend toasters, buy a microwave oven!---[mute]-- What am I saying! I'm selling freaking toasters!!!"